I used up all of the characters that was the purpose of this post congratulations to me and my ability to overshare on the internet

When the chorus conductor asks you to stand up and start reading from page 32 measure 46 but you have a tachycardia disorder and you’re suddenly blind and everyone starts singing and by the time you regain your vision they’re on measure 75 and then you start mouthing “watermelon” until you figure out where the fuck you are in the Agnus Dei and you’re too shy to ask the person standing next to you and then you finally find where you are but it’s a tenor solo and you accidentally sing over them an

[when there’s a newly-born race of plant people whom I treat with disdain and one of them is talking to me about equal justice and I, being a bigot, want to dismiss them glibly while using a slur against their people]

ok bloomer

if cancel culture is real than how come the ghastly woman who keeps materializing in my house wont stop no matter how many times I decapitated her

Oh yeah it’s ableist because I have SPD idk what else to say BUT FUCK TAGS

The tag on my hello kitty onesie is making my back itchy :( I don’t like it

Also Joker 2019™️ Major triggered me and my one goal was to walk out of that movie feeling unaffected but I almost cried.

I literally almost dropped my phone because there was an ad for an app that was like a driving game and the little 2D cartoon car crashed into another little 2D cartoon car and I got heart palpations. I truly am the weakest link.

Me now: *gets PTSD triggered from a drawing*

Charlie Puth? Do the teens listen to Charlie Puth? Sean Mendez? Fuckin, uh. Camillo cabella’s?

CW: ch*rlie p*th 

My friend wants me to make a playlist for her but I don’t know what good music is anymore. I’ve been listening to the same mountain goats playlist for like 2 years nonstop and now everything that’s not the mountain goats gives me a stroke.

The trick to never getting cancelled is to have an incredibly shallow, cat-picture-based online personality and to only have loud opinions about things nobody sincerely gets worked up about, like pop punk and which season of the Simpsons is the best (probably 4)

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A friendly mastodon instance primarily for shitposting, gays, and the glory of the free and open source software movement.