ash @apisashla@www.librepunk.club

they call me assless ash

*at a corporate presentation* so in order to leverage parallelism to run our app we have to sh. we gotta sha- excuse me. there's a process called shPFFFhaha- I'm sorry. We sh-

I am a mature grown-up person and can definitely handle the information that splitting a database across multiple machines is called "sharding"

mormon youth pastor: you know how to play elden ring, but do you answer the door when the elders ring??

me trying to think about religion is an interesting experience because I experience the same thing as real religion doers where my brain attempts to comprehend ideas that are much too big for it but whereas a normal person would experience something like awe, my tiny little brain just goes "hm. neat!" and continues trying to process it rationally, like a little shrimp traversing a whalefall

my partner, just now: was the gremp there?

(referencing this classic of birdsite post https://twitter.com/murrman5/status/1179046435737800705)

just attempted to search using "gremp"

from software? yeah, I sure hope it is

they call me large club from ellen ring because baby I got that clout

clout
clout
let it all out

hey everyone it's me, Large Club, main character of the hit game Elven Ring. great to be here with all you fine people tonight

I have to give credit to dung-eater because he lives in a fantasy world which is honestly a living hell for pretty much everyone, including the beings who are supposed to benefit from its arrangement, and thought real hard and said "y'know, I bet if I put effort into it and do my best, I could make all of this much worse."