Pinned toot
Pinned toot

I'm serious, by the way, when I say that I don't want credit for anything I say. You can share or repost the stuff I post, just please leave my name out of it.

Pinned toot

uspol, military 

Pinned toot

Sometimes people follow me and I'm like what the fuck? Don't be a sheep.

Pinned toot

This is my shitposting alt. My "main", if you will.

heterosexual masculinity is so boring... "I'm an exceptional person because I have very nice grass." My own dad brags that people have been randomly walking by the house and have said he has a very nice lawn. Just... look at all that space I could have dandelions... :blobcattilt:

2019: Joker comes out

2020: government says we can't be in a society anymore

coincidence?

Imagine seeing the word "accessibility" and saying, "Hm, I feel like this word is too easy to understand. What if we condensed it to a wholly unintuitive 4-character abbreviation?"

unpleasant 

password breaches are a great time to delete a bunch of accounts you're not using!

being bisexual means i'm attracted to exactly two genders. not gonna say which ones though

Photo of my thighs, read the caption before opening the photo! Painting ec 

buying women's clothes, rolling 2d6 to figure out my size

why would you ever get the Gamer Site Application on your phone
i don't understand tbh

callout post (not serious) 

creating a sophisticated neural network to make plans with people with always cancel at the last minute. yes ive made a deep flake

vague 

a honeypot is when you post something like "white people don't wipe their butts" then block anyone who begs to differ

CW meta PSA 

CW meta PSA 

Show thread

me, every once in a while: remember when i actually had good jesus content? what happened to that?
me, 10 minutes later: lol okay so here are 5 great jesus jokes. i'm back y'all

call me a purist, but it's my staunch belief that "garage bands" should only make songs about garages

the problem with federation is you don't always see all the replies, and you often end up with like 5 people giving you the same piece of bad advice

Show more
☠️ librepunk ☠️

A friendly mastodon instance primarily for shitposting, gays, and the glory of the free and open source software movement.